"fastball. the trolls are foaming from their toothless holes. rumor mill abundant with evil gossip. mainstream heretics smirking..." - Charlie Sheen
I finally pulled my head out of my own ass long enough to investigate the Charlie Sheen Tweets and one thing is abundantly clear - the man is suffering from the kind of genius only money can buy. Money and a lot of drugs. But that's fine - it used to be that there was absolutely nothing more mesmerizing than watching a millionaire celebrity playboy cannonball himself around Hollywood, hopped up on goofballs, taking down any target he could get into his sights. But that has all changed now that some evil scientist has wired a high-speed CAT5 cable directly into the Id of their King.
I can only imagine what the world looks like through Charlie Sheen's eyes - it must be some early 90's version of Virtual Reality, everything in flat colored polygons with no detail, barely in 3D. Oh, what I'd pay to ride that Being John Malkovich carnival roller coaster - woo, boy! - with no brakes, speeding down that numb tunnel of crazy, taking down everything in my path, drinking Tigerblood and soaring on the wings of a pterodactyl...
But all that is neither here nor there. The Art of Speed show opened on Friday in Middletown, and from every angle I saw, it was a success. The opening was sponsored by Narragansett beer, so they poured that, keeping it classy by serving about four ounces at a time. These tiny cups of beer became impossible to manage as I had nothing to gauge them against, and they quickly got under me. As the art show settled down and after several strange conversations, we made our way to the after-party at Eli Cannon's where I managed to spill half a pint of delicious Sierra Nevada pale ale on Leigh's Iphone. #winning
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